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[personal profile] igpayatinlay
harlow hart
SEX Well, the most important part is probably that Harlow believes she can't have sex like a normal person. To some degree it's true, because if she gets worked up enough to really enjoy it, the odds are sort of reasonable (at this stage of her power development) that she'll become untouchable. On the other hand, she's only ever tried to have sex once ever, so who's to say it's going to happen every single time? The answer even as the person who plays her is, I don't know if it would happen or not, but the point is that she thinks it's likely, and she's spent the last three and a half years feeling certain that this is something only a fetishist could endure without visible horror. She can't wrap her mind around the idea of herself as a desirable creature, except for being a subject of creepy erotica that couldn't be farther from who she really is. I don't want people to pity this girl so much, because her life has never been all that bad, especially when compared to vols who lived on the streets or were in jails, but Harlow has a really hard time identifying who she wants to be and what she thinks and what makes her uniquely Harlow. It isn't at all that I'm having a hard time finding her voice, it's that she's in flux right now; she's at a place in her life where she's moved away from home for the second time after the first was a relative failure, where she's just beginning to open her mind to everything to do with being a vol after years and years of repression and self-loathing. It's a nice thing to write in that she's asking herself dozens and dozens of questions she never did before, and learning so much about herself, and starting to have opinions - even if they change with what feels like every other new question asked - but it probably does not make for the perfect picture of a woman you want to have sex with. I think without a solid self-identity, she's probably not going to be appealing enough for any guy to make a move on her in a way that isn't half a joke or a random and casual encounter, and while I can see her having sex outside of a relationship given the right circumstances, it would still mean more to her than just a penis and a vagina. When it comes down to the sex itself, I think it's obvious that she's desperately lacking any kind of experience, though it doesn't mean she isn't eager or intrigued or even open to adventure. The real kicker is that in writing her so far, she's really most instinctively attracted to men who are not actually attracted to her. Essentially, while I think I would be heartily entertained by Harlow getting laid, be it through Vi's plotting or her own strange luck, I really doubt that it's going to click, with someone she finds sexy actually wanting to pick up a not-so-sexy (for all that she's naked) girl.

DATING She also has very little experience with this! The idea of dating someone makes her twelve kinds of smiley and nervous and contemplate contacts. I think she would be an alright person to date, even though she probably would get a little too involved a little too fast. She's nice, she's not overly high maintenance, she would be pretty easily won over with far less effort than it should take to properly date someone. Trouble would be that she's a little bit choosy when you consider the pool of choices at IVI: no one more than two years younger, no one who's happy living a life of "serious" crime, no one who's mean for fun. Guys, this says something about you as a collective, srsly. :P

LTR This is the hardest for me to even consider because she has never had a long term relationship, unless your standards bar for this is about three months, and hers is higher. I can say that she is super prejudiced against the idea of having a serious relationship with a normal human, because... HOW??? After all that she's been through now, it seems so hard to fathom the idea of a Norm actually relating to her or accepting her. This blows because her pool of men are all younger than her, and all going through similar levels of angst and woe and self discovery. It also blows because a long term relationship at IVI seems like the worst idea ever. It isn't like comic books; those people have the whole world and sometimes far beyond the whole world to escape each other, if things go badly. If Harlow winds up being needy or a guy ends up letting her down (or vice versa, equal opportunity relationship fuckups, ppl), she still has to interact with them on at least a semi-regular basis. I don't think she would be the crazy ex so much as she would just retreat into her shell, but all the same, it would be uncomfortable, and even though she doesn't have experience in the field, she's clever enough to realize that this isn't something for her to jump into lightly.

I was going to do Jack too, but it's 5 am and even though I'm not tired, I wish I was so I'm going to go to bed. Just think of it like a cliffhanger, for part two?
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igpayatinlay

February 2013

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